Tragic loss

It's with a very heavy heart and a lot of tears that I write this. This morning, just after 7 o'clock, our beloved Copen was killed. She was in the back yard, probably enjoying the morning sun as she waited for breakfast, when she was brutally attacked by a neighborhood dog. I heard the barking and thought the next-door neighbor's puppy had gotten loose and was aggravating Copen. As I rushed to the back door in my robe, I instead saw a large, brown dog attacking Copen. I yelled. The dog ran. Copen looked feebly at me as I ran up to her. She was gone not long afterward. Steve came home when I gave him the news. He dug her a nice, deep grave, saying it was the least she deserved. We both stroked her one last time and laid her to rest with the cat treats she loved and her favorite toy. We'll put a proper marker stone in place this coming weekend.

It's been five hours now and I'm still a mess. Steve's gone back to work, but he's broken up about it, too. I try to content myself knowing she was really happy outside. She was more active and spirited out there than she had been inside. But I know she was lonely, too. And I regret so much not spending more time with her. But it's so easy to get caught up with chores and projects. I spent time with her every day, but I should have spent more. That's all she wanted.

I had Copen from the day she was born. We hadn't planned to keep her, but we couldn't find a good home, so she stayed in ours. She was a big, fat softy. She was also temperamental. If she was upset about something, she'd let you know by peeing somewhere. That's why she ended up outside.

But she was really happy out there. So I don't regret that at all. I just regret that she was attacked by some asshole's dog. I regret that she died in the brief span of time I ran back in the house to get the phone. I regret that I didn't pet her when I found her, because I was worried she'd be in so much pain. She deserved so much better than that.

And all I want now is for that dog to show up on my property just one more time . . .

Steve just came back home. He couldn't go back to work.